a favorite adoption photo

3/22/2002 — the day we adopted Nate. Hands

Originally uploaded by Mom2One

You might think that I’d pick the photo of the first time that I held Energy Boy — and that is one of my favorite photos. Or you might think I’d pick a favorite first picture of EB and his dad together, and there is one that’s especially sweet to me. But when I thought about what adoption really means, this photo came to mind.

It’s such a simple photo — you can’t even really see EB. This is March 22, 2002, the day that we traveled to Ha Tinh, Vietnam to adopt him. It was a hot day, and we spent the entire day at the orphanage. In this photo, he’s sleeping on his stomach. Unposed, I have my hand on his back on the left side, and his caregiver has her hand on his back on the right side.

This photo speaks volumes to me. Two hands, one that had been caring for him for four months and was sadly saying good-bye. One that had loved him, held him, indeed, mothered him . . . and cried on the day that he left, but also told us through an interpreter that she was glad that he was going to a family . . . . for, what she didn’t say was that there would be more babies coming to care for.

The other hand, attached to a person who had been waiting to mother this child, whose heart was full but was also anxious about everything that mothering this child meant. A Caucasian hand entering into an Asian country, not fully knowing everything that meant at the time. A hand of a person who meant well, but had so very much to learn about adoptive mothering . . . . but who thankfully had her heart and mind opened by this little one underneath her hand.

Love . . . from one hand to another. Mothering . . . passing from one hand to another. Trust . . . from one hand to another.

Open hearts, open hands. Adoption through two loving hands.